~I never bled for a thousand miles just to stem the flow, I never wept over a thousand lives just to let this go~
~Vancouver Sleep Clinic
Immersed in the totality of blackness, essence entwined in inscrutable transference, floating into the unfathomable folds of “the further”, a feeling of completely losing control, conscious mind and this bodily vessel couldn’t be further apart from one another, surrendering as the lids of these eyes begin to shutter, fear layeth within the layers of every mumbled mutter. Yet this unrelenting gravitational pull, a powerful force, simply not experienced by every man, even when given the chance, although existing as likenesses of each other. A devolving, a gradual disintegration, free falling, floating weightless, every vessel overwhelmed by this heaviness, no time to second guess, thrown into the throes of the ultimate test, incessant whispers that a coward dies a thousand deaths, the intensity of these vibrations, ringing true, yet instill no certain answers are in clear view, haven’t I a clue?, yet instill this endeavor is an obligation, an impassioned pursuit, a stipulation of this life contract, causing much to ensue, an epochal purview.
And so I continue to aimlessly drift away, in a daze for days, heart heavy from the hymns of this haze, entangled in this enigmatic enclave, a tapestry of events conspiring for the soul of me to traverse through the murky depths of this maze, radically ripped apart all to be remade. Unapologetically untamed, un-raveling yet unashamed, revelations remain as reverberating renditions, embers of the essence of me fortified by the ferocity of each flickering flame, as my once pristine paradigm is reframed, impurities perennially purified, perception unequivocally changed, taking heed to wise whispers from my innermost sage, indelibly inscribed as a prophetic phase, clarity incessantly craved, pieces of me crying out to be saved, hitherto a knowing that nothing shall truly remain, a crafty aide-mémoire to submit, bow to this insurmountable truth and be brave. Although this reality may seem grave, in the end we shall rave, contingent upon collapsing into oneself without delay, and the sacred questionings that are raised, only then shall you be bestowed with much sought after grace, all arising regrets disappear without a trace, eternally erased, all to be restoratively replaced, kept sacredly encased, in the only hospitable place of holding, ones heart space.
Insatiable inquiries enveloped in insatiable questioning, an esoteric stillness, exquisitely soul nourishing, unequivocally soothing, an unearthly undoing, a preciously prophetic pursuing. Profundity protectively penetrates throughout every bone of my being, intently burning down the stakes for my sanity’s sake, enlightening insights emanate as wells of tears unyielding for years dismantles the once sturdy stakes, unwaveringly washing away, vanishing without a trace. A prelude to an escape, as each epiphany envelopes me in an all-encompassing embrace. Internal worlds and external worlds interlaced. Pieces of the puzzle fall into place, prophetically integrate, all inklings of doubt incinerate. If not now than when? nevernind question later, the time is nigh to dive off the deep end, before its too late, for the esoteric key layeth at the bottom of the lake, a sanctified sea within you see, for if solace is what you seek, you must dance with the dismal depths of the dark undauntingly, hover in the harbor of all that is haunting the ancient soul of thee. My dear yes, “fear & love” life & death a divinely daunting dichotomy, yet, an ever-endearing acceptance of all that is comprised of our reality, shall irrevocably invoke for the unfurling of ones unseen wings, allowing for one’s soul to soar freely.
In retrospect, a remote viewing of a time to be reverenced. Insidiously heaven sent, worthy to be praised, eternally existentially engaged as the essence of this existence fades, esoteric echoes soothe the soul of me, delivering me with their storied shadows, a consolatory shade. Consciousness Consoled by the calming notion that the light shall be your guide through and through, an allowing of the light to reveal differing dimensions of the soul of you, and as you fumble through, traversing through the fibrous core of all that exists as you, allow the light to soothe you, marvel at the way in which it carefully molds you, cradles you and holds you. The enigmatic is that which makes life even remotely exciting, each labyrinthine layer irrefutably inviting, coasting along as my consciousness persists in an upward sort of drifting, through the worm whole, time space reality indefinitely shifting, invokes for a reverenced remembering of the undeniable uprising that invariably accompanies the dismal descending, a dream within a dream you see, nothing is as it seems you see, yet instill these apparitions do vividly appear to thee, incontestably, shadows of storied souls interlaced betwixt infinity, the culmination of a most synchronistic tapestry, all existing as reflections of one another, illusive veils envelope each and every one of our realties, it is not until the veil is lifted that our hearts shall see that love is the key to everything, underlying everything, all that ever was, all that is, and all that ever will be. And if any suspicion shall arise to thee, remember that an un-mending is simply the manifestation of the growing pains of a new beginning, interwoven with the intention of an unavoidable ascending.
~Do not go Gentle into the Goodnight, Rage, Rage against the dying of the light~
Vancouver Sleep Clinic-Stakes
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